Is it really "All in the mind" ?
There's a saying "it's all in your mind"...is this true?...
Absolutely! 100%..The Mind can alter the way you look at things so you are unable to put things into perspective properly, change your way of thinking & indeed make you think there are things in life that you "need" and "must have". This could be said about so many things from the latest I Phone to that delicious chocolate gateaux you just can't resist on the supermarket shelf..Of course clever advertising & marketing "plants the seed" the you must have it!
In my case my "must have" was what I thought was an addiction "alcohol" one of the worst, most harmful & totally underestimated drugs ever in my eyes. Capable of ruining lives & if you let it..taking lives. I thought I was dependent on this demon for some 25 years..for most of these blurred years alcohol completely ruled my life, ruined most of it...and in the end nearly took it.
So after falling ill after my 25 year bender I decided that enough was enough...I didn't want to wake up feeling so bad every day...having to down enough alcohol to stop me shaking enough to deal with the day..indeed having to plan ahead and think about my day and ensure alcohol would be available to me at all times..weather this meant filling a coke bottle with brandy to make it through a flight or hiding a bottle under a cupboard from my partner so it was available when I thought I needed it. Indeed alcohol had a far bigger influence over me than any women ever did...it was my all & everything.
A total necessity that had to be involved at all points possible...even to the extent of missing my daughters birth because I was in a bar busy drinking. The "hold" that this drug can take can be so strong....or so I always thought. Until one day when I woke up, dry, sweating,trying to remember what happened the previous day & looking like a bloated old man far older than my years. Something in my mind said "Enough".
I had one meeting and spoke to my GP and I must thank him for his words..because they stuck with me..even to this day. He said "You must tell yourself Mark. Not that you are going to cut down or take a break from drinking (which is what I was telling myself or what I was hoping for) you must tell yourself that you are never drinking again! I was shocked...but as time went on I realized how right he was and as the sweaty, shaky days passed I slowly got better, stronger & fitter. My whole life changed..for the better in so many ways....indeed it was a completely different life in so many ways..socially,family wise,financially...the hardest thing for me?..filling the huge gap of time that was left by not drinking..it was massive.
I started to enjoy different things that I would never of previously had time for..shopping,,family ect. As time passed & I was feeling better I loved my new life. Not having to worry about money or if I had enough to get me through the day...People I bumped into that knew me said "Hi your looking well" as my bloated stomach began to shrink, the bags under my eyes shrank and the redness in my cheeks faded. This in-fact helped me a lot in staying on the right road & after a long time I could honestly say that I wouldn't want a drink now anyway.
I have far to many bad memories that I wouldn't entertain it now...if only I had realized this earlier. I would indeed be a very rich man in my own right..but I'm alive!..i have some lovely family & most of all I'm happy!