How do i accept myself?

by sabrina estrada
(san antonio tx)


Question:

How do i accept myself? iv had issues with this because im in High school and its really hard to accept my self because im always seeing other girls walking by and i say to myself wow i wish i looked as skinny as her or i wish i looked pretty as her!!?? Then i start wanting to change but for me to change would take alot so i just wanna know how to accept myself and not change for anybody but me?

Answer:

The first thing I want to say ,is remember and get present to the fact that high school does not last forever even though at times it does feel that way. I remember I could not wait for it to be over and now I look back and think what a very small part it has played in my life in the grand scheme of things.

Now to the real question how do you accept yourself. The first thing you need to know is that there are other girls looking at you saying the same thing or saying I wish I was as smart as her, or as tall as her, or as athletic as her or whatever it is they do not find appealing in themselves. We all do it. I don’t believe I know a single person that doesn’t look at someone else and think I wish I had her (put in any thing you like) hair, her, eye lashes, her clothes, her attitude, her confidence. This phenomenon is human nature and it doesn’t only appear in high school.

The first step in accepting yourself is seeing what is in you that you love. What is in you that others are wishing they had. Every human being is amazing and unique and have something special to share. What is your something special? Try this little exercise. Get out a pen and paper and write down all the amazing things about you that you wouldn’t trade for anything. This is the place to start. Continue to add to the list as you think of things.

When I was in junior high I was awkward and not cute by any means. I lacked self confidence and I really didn’t have many friends. When I started to focus on what it was I liked about myself I started sharing those things with others and focusing on those things. I look back at pictures of myself from then and into high school and I can tell you I looked my best during the times of my life when I was really appreciating the great things I had to offer.

I can look at pictures of me as an adult as well and there are some periods in my life when I was smoking hot and guess what those are the periods that I was the happiest. I was not happy because I was hot. I was hot because I was happy with who I was and what I was doing.

Today I am able to live happily, make friends with strangers in an instant and feel like I have all I need. When there is something I want to change I simply go to work on it. For me at this stage of my life it is not how I look, but the work I do so that is what I go to work on. If there is something you want to transform about yourself and it will take a lot of work there really is no problem there is only a lot of work. You have to decide if that work is really worth it to you or if you want to focus that energy on something else.

One last thing. You are perfect the way you are. You do not need to change anything about yourself and what you are feeling is ok, more than that it is normal. It is all a part of the human nature. Also, remember as humans we and we alone of the animal kingdom have the power to create anything we desire. So, except what it is that you are and then make a commitment to be whatever it is you want to be. Who you are and who you aspire to be are both unique and incredible and you have something wonderful to contribute to the world.

P.S.

I can tell by your photo that you are absolutely adorable. What a great smile. Seeing that smile as I walk down the halls of school would be a blessing.

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